Anima Mosaic
Bad Kids Jokes Special: Unanswered Jokes 4

badkidsjokes:

Submissions by different kids, all without answers.

what do you call a tranpelean whith jam on it

 why did a car poo?

what do you call snake what has an apple on his head

what do you get if you cross a chicken with a bean

how long are you

WHAT DO YOU CALL A COW WITH NO HEAD

what is the secret name in the whole wide wourld

why did the toy move

what is a cow

how are you not fine

what do you call a bird and a bananer

why does a cow hate a cowboy.

what do you call a tiger who can fly

who is a cow who eats poo and wee and jelly togeter

what do you call a green bird with no feathers,hands or legs

HOW DO YOU MAKE NOTHING

npr:

His second job will be at a pre-school.
As a student.
Four-year-old Bobby Tufts was re-elected “mayor” over the weekend in the tiny northern Minnesota community of Dorset. We say “mayor” because Dorset doesn’t really have a government. It doesn’t even have many people — “22 to 28, depending on whether the minister and his family are in town,” according to CBS Minnesota.
Even the most politically polarized Americans could get behind Tufts’ pro-ice cream agenda, The Fiscal Times reported. 

“Chocolate. And vanilla. Strawberry. Cotton candy-kind. And rainbow sherbet,” the mayor said.

Tufts drew his own name out of the ballot box on Sunday, securing another year in government for the miniature politician.
Read the rest on NPR’s The Two-Way blog.
(Photo courtesy of Brianna Ehley/The Fiscal Times)

npr:

His second job will be at a pre-school.

As a student.

Four-year-old Bobby Tufts was re-elected “mayor” over the weekend in the tiny northern Minnesota community of Dorset. We say “mayor” because Dorset doesn’t really have a government. It doesn’t even have many people — “22 to 28, depending on whether the minister and his family are in town,” according to CBS Minnesota.

Even the most politically polarized Americans could get behind Tufts’ pro-ice cream agenda, The Fiscal Times reported. 

“Chocolate. And vanilla. Strawberry. Cotton candy-kind. And rainbow sherbet,” the mayor said.

Tufts drew his own name out of the ballot box on Sunday, securing another year in government for the miniature politician.

Read the rest on NPR’s The Two-Way blog.

(Photo courtesy of Brianna Ehley/The Fiscal Times)

strangers-project:

When I was younger, I’ve always wanted a pet zebra. That was only a few years ago, when I was 7. Now I’m 11.I asked my mom about getting a pet zebra, and she said “NO ABBY YOU CANNOT GET A PET ZEBRA DO YOU KNOW HOW ABSURD THAT IS?!” Maybe she wasn’t actually yelling, but she wasn’t like, “Abby dear, we cannot get a pet zebra.” So I decided to write a song about her called, “Dreamcrusher.”Now I know that the idea of getting a pet zebra is absurd, but then I thought it was perfectly normal. I was a bit strange back then. When I was 4, I was a DEVIL CHILD!!! I bit my pre-k teacher so many times. Seven years ago. But now I’m alright. I know that biting = bad.

strangers-project:

When I was younger, I’ve always wanted a pet zebra. That was only a few years ago, when I was 7. Now I’m 11.

I asked my mom about getting a pet zebra, and she said “NO ABBY YOU CANNOT GET A PET ZEBRA DO YOU KNOW HOW ABSURD THAT IS?!” Maybe she wasn’t actually yelling, but she wasn’t like, “Abby dear, we cannot get a pet zebra.” So I decided to write a song about her called, “Dreamcrusher.”

Now I know that the idea of getting a pet zebra is absurd, but then I thought it was perfectly normal. I was a bit strange back then. When I was 4, I was a DEVIL CHILD!!! I bit my pre-k teacher so many times. Seven years ago. But now I’m alright. I know that biting = bad.

NO.TOO CUTE. BRAIN MELT.

NO.TOO CUTE. BRAIN MELT.

robokittens:

 9 Hilariously Distressing Letters From Kids

ngl the best part of this is the “be a good boy” pentagram

Happy Birthday! Have you heard of Satan?

ijbetty:

john-waynes-gun:

secretlivesobviouslies:

The 13 Creepiest Things a Child Has Ever Said to It’s Parents

The 3rd one. Omg

Fucking nope.

I always assumed that all young children thought this way

Children are tiny sociopaths. I wish I was as hardcore now as I was at 4.

mercycorps:

From Feature Shoot:

Shot over a period of 18 months, Italian photographer Gabriele Galimberti’s project Toy Stories compiles photos of children from around the world with their prized possesions—their toys. Galimberti explores the universality of being a kid amidst the diversity of the countless corners of the world; saying, “at their age, they are pretty all much the same; they just want to play.”

See more photos.

Sits down to complete and online evaluation for a job.

Neighbor children next door decide now is the perfect time to run outside screaming.


While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, an officer was interrupted by a little boy about six years old. Looking up and down at his uniform, he asked, “Are you a cop?”
“Yes,” he replied and continued writing the report.“My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?”“Yes, that’s right,” he told him.“Well, then,” he said as he extended his foot towards the officer, “would you please tie my shoe?”

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, an officer was interrupted by a little boy about six years old. Looking up and down at his uniform, he asked, “Are you a cop?”

“Yes,” he replied and continued writing the report.

“My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?”

“Yes, that’s right,” he told him.

“Well, then,” he said as he extended his foot towards the officer, “would you please tie my shoe?”

narunfiltered:

Movie Theater
Montana USA

I worked the floor in a movie theater for several years. Most customers made me want to choke them (seriously, be nice to your theater staff). There were a few that made up for all the rest, though. One night, I was selling tickets. It was fairly slow, and I had no…

A conversation a friend of mine had with her child
Mom: Go to sleep.
Kid: I can't sleep.
Mom: Why not?
Kid: I'm too awesome.
furrytail2310:

Should you have children? Take this test and find out! :P

re-bloging mostly for the first question. That one is very important.

furrytail2310:

Should you have children? Take this test and find out! :P

re-bloging mostly for the first question. That one is very important.

A scene I saw yesterday. A father and his son enter the store; the son was about 3 years old, pulled away and started running ahead
Father: Hey! Slow down. You need to hold my hand and stay with me. You could get lost.
Son: I know where I going!
Father: Oh really, you do huh? Ok, lead the way!
Son: *runs straight to the doughnuts*